Life:The teacher with the stick (Embracing painful lessons)
Life dolls out lessons.
Painful lessons that end up in self blame or us blaming other people. Throughout much of my pain especially with dating, or partners, even friendships. The message was, value yourself. Respect yourself, admire yourself. It's a lesson that takes a life time to sink in. It's a lesson that takes much analysis, over analysis, projection, draining. It's an exhausting lesson. It's hard to play the blame game on yourself, especially when someone has acted appaulingly to you. Take responsibility for your choice, and your agenda. It's tough, many times in life we find ourselves knowing what to do and ending up hypocrites. Remember this though, it was a lesson learned. For example that painful experience with a guy that pretended to be Mr wonderful, who hurt your feelings and lowered your self esteem, you've seen what you need to see. He can never approach you pretending to be Mr nice Guy, those rose tinted glasses are gone, that guy who seemed to spend a lifetime trying to get your attention and when he got it acted like an arsehole, will think twice before approaching you again, the guy who appeared to like you then began to loose interest as soon as others started whispering in his ear, will think twice before desperately hunting you down. You would have changed, you will have something he can never grasp, confidence and self respect. He will look but think twice about touching, will gaze but even the concept of speaking to you, will terrify him, because you have changed. Your stronger, more confident in yourself, happier and completely unavailable. The sad thing about guys like this is that some of us are actually stupid enough to try. Women i've spoken to have often cracked this joke, 'they always come back,' because sadly some guys who seem to have crawled out of the dirt, become drawn to you once more. When they see that they've lost you. All your attentions, and your affections, or there's a possibility they could. Do not be swayed by sulking, or words with cinnamon and honey, the fantasy of who they were has changed, the reality of who they are lives on. Embrace the lesson even if it's painful, the universe is trying to tell you something.
image by (proud of being strange)